The Conveyancing Queen

The Conveyancing Queen

Anastasia just needs to stop. For real, Anastasia. It’s bad enough that you have a super long name, that you insist on everyone using it and not shortening it to something more manageable, how you kissed Derrick at the School Social and tried to say you didn’t even though there’s an actual PHOTO on the school intranet of you doing it, and that you came back from a week-long trip to Switzerland pretending you’d picked up a thick “Swiss accent.”

You don’t even know what a Swiss accent is, Anastasia…no one does.

But now she’s trying to say that she’s going to TAFE to learn how to join a property conveyancing company in Melbourne. For starters, Anastasia, I don’t even think you know what conveyancers do. She probably just heard it somewhere and thought it sounded good. I know what they are because my parents own a few investment properties and they’re talking about conveyancers all the time. I played dumb though and asked Anastasia what they do, and she looked at me like I was dumb (I was only PLAYING dumb, for the record) and said “they convey stuff, duh.”

Dangit. I forgot how clever she can be. Now everyone is convinced that Anastasia knows more than me, which is NOT true. It’s the opposite! I’m the property conveyancing expert, not her! This is the worst. She already took the credit for our group project on how baby formula is killing the environment, and now I have to deal with this.

I need to ask my parents about more specific stuff that I’ve always tried to ignore, like title transfers and something about the section 32 vendors statement and maybe also…um…okay, I’m gonna gather some intel. I WILL prove that all of Anastasia’s conveyancing lies are truly lies. She probably doesn’t even know how to rent a place, let alone buying one. That’s way too much paperwork for someone like her.

-Kelisa

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