So I was reading a magazine, and there was an article titled ‘How to Look Rich…Even When You’re Not’. I’ve been buying these things for years and they’ve never had anything close to this useful in them. Usually it’s just 101 great tips to make your cat love you, or a complete guide to the beginnings of electronica-synth-rock in the 1960s. Now, something truly useful!
The first step is to buy a tiny dog that fits in a handbag, so…I’m skipping to number 2: tinted windows, everywhere. Just…tint everything. Wear sunglasses, tint the windows of your home, go totally crazy in your tinting crusade. I’ll be on the lookout for the best company to sort out my residential window tinting. Melbourne has plenty of building that have tinting so it shouldn’t be too difficult to find the best. They’re ready to make your tinting dream a reality, so says the article.
Look, actually, this makes a lot of sense. Wearing sunglasses all the time means that you have all the power. Nobody can see your eyes, and sometimes they’re so strong that YOU can’t see anything, thus making you that much more cut off from the modern riff-raff. Now I’m thinking about what it’d be like if I got tinted windows all around my house. Nobody could see in, whereas I could be looking out at them all, laughing at my immense authority and perceived wealth. It’s also great for privacy, and rich people love that stuff. Just…walls everywhere. Walls and cameras, which seems silly because they could save a lot of time and money just by getting some residential window tinting in there.
I’m also loving the thought of having my windows tinted at work, and ONLY my windows. I’ll tell the boss that it’s to do with productivity and boom, commercial window tinting for me, handing me all the power and style. And…affluence. Well, everyone at work will think so, and I can definitely fool myself. That’s what it’s about, right?